Sometimes, Our Society Sucks
Self-censorship has become so ingrained, we withhold even the most innocent of compliments.
Our society is so twisted, even I self-censor myself.
I know. Hard to believe, right?
And I don't know why it is bothering me, but it is. It is such a small thing but now, a few days later, it seems much bigger.
A couple of days ago, I drove to a metal fabrication shop about 30 minutes south of my home to pick up some window well covers they fabricated for me. When I walked into the office to let them know I was there to pick them up, I came face to face with their receptionist/administrative person.
She was a young redhead with the most stunning blue eyes I believe I have ever seen. They were clear blue and against the red hair framing her face, they seemed to glow.
I'm not in danger of being a Bill Clintonesque horn dog, myself being 63 years-old with bad knees and never that good looking to begin with, but I had to force myself to look away because I didn't want her to think I was some creepy old stalker dude - and in doing that, I probably looked like some creepy old stalker dude.
I wanted to honestly compliment her - no strings attached - but I immediately suppressed the idea because...well, these days, you never know how people will see such as a compliment or some sort of personal violation.
So I went about my business and went over to the warehouse across the street and loaded up. As I did, this kept bothering me. In my mind, I was turning over the reasons why I didn't just say something that might have brightened her day a bit. A little lift in her spirit might have been appreciated - I even thought about turning around and going back because I know how dealing with customers can suck and she was positive, efficient and frankly, pretty nice.
She made me feel good about buying window well covers, which is no small accomplishment - window well covers don't really evoke strong emotional responses.
On the ride home, this was churning over and over in my mind, how that we restrict ourselves in giving out the most simple and innocent of compliments because our society harshly punishes even the good words and thoughts for crazy reasons - or no reason at all.
I think my self censoring robbed the girl of the pleasure of being complimented and me of the joy of giving the compliment.
I keep wondering if, through the Butterfly Effect, what changes that little, innocent compliment might have initiated - or which ones not giving it did.
Sometimes our contemporary society just sucks.
If anybody knows a redhead with stunning blue eyes who works at Utah Window Well Covers in Lindon, Utah, tell her I'm sorry I didn't speak up.
And that I'm not a creeper, of course.
You are right, but maybe over-analyzing just this one time. If she looked like the picture, no wonder. But I think she'll get over it, or not even notice.
Can't say I blame you, but I've been told I don't have a filter and boy is that a double edged sword.
I found at the tender age of 16, I was not fit for working in a field where constant or frequent contact with the public was not a good fit. Even that young, my tolerance for BS and stupid people was in the negative value category. I gravitated to vocations where I worked either on my own, or in manageable sized crews. You'd still find morons, but there seems to be a never ending supply and if they're good at what they do, out of practicality I'd get callouses on my tongue from biting it, if only to facilitate getting the job done.
One Christmas season long ago, I witnessed a retail clerk being berated mercilessly by someone that had they treated me that was would have been flat one their back, looking up wondering what the hell had just happened. I felt truly bad for this woman as I was certain she'd been working and taking crap like that she was enduring, all day. When it became my turn to have her ring up my purchases, I apologized on the behalf of humanity that cretins like she'd just dealt with were allowed to roam freely among us. From that day forward I promised myself I would try to bring a smile or good cheer to those that got paid poorly to deal with the dregs of humanity.
Not unsurprisingly, that's had mixed results as some of the idiots have retail jobs and will turn the best intentioned compliments into personal attacks, but I remain undeterred. If someone takes offense at my well wishes, that's on them. I'm responsible for what I say, not what they heard.