I'm going to start a magazine called "Degree Spectator" – it would be like "Wine Spectator" except for universities and colleges.
I'll rank the degrees by college, vintage, and educational conditions.
The best will get something like this:
2006 University of Richmond School of Law, Juris Doctor
Degree Spectator Score: 94
Possessing a crème de cassis flavor and a velvety texture that soothes the palate, this rich and indulgent degree is easy to love. The charming black fruits, baking spices and cassis notes are well matched by rounded tannins and the significant earning potential versus the relatively affordable price combine in a ratio to make this degree a taste to remember.
In the middle of the pack:
2013 University of Utah, Bachelor of Finance and Accounting
Degree Spectator Score: 82
The Utes specialize in administrative and management degrees. This well-crafted degree is a result of that work. Aromas of cherry, mint and a light note of licorice rise from the campus and the taste is fresh and savory, with herbs balancing sweet notes of berries. It has vigorous acidity and gripping tannins providing a good structure. Earnings are average, typically requiring additional aging of a master’s degree to achieve full flavor.
The worst:
2024 Columbia University, Bachelor of Social Work
Degree Sectator Score: 11
With a tumultuous finish to an interrupted growing season, this vintage from Columbia literally withered on the vine. Bitter and underdeveloped with the earning potential of a Starbucks barista, this vintage leaves an unforgettable, lingering taste on the palate, mostly because it tastes like a cross between apple cider vinegar and horse urine (or at least what our tasters think horse urine tastes like). Not recommended unless you are trying to kill yourself.
I think I’m going to start looking for investors.
Haha. Not your best but even legendary writers need a cracker to cleanse the palate.. so to speak.
I'd subscribe